Love Is... (Part 59 - Forgiveness 2)

Darryl just continues crying in Kenny’s shoulder until he fallen asleep…

*Alarm sounded*

Darryl woke up and realizes that he had fallen asleep in Kenny arms… The body warmth of Kenny makes him feel secure… He just wants to snuggle in with him but then again, he feels weird about the feeling as he is unsure whether he should forgive Kenny… What if what he say is true… Maybe nothing really happens between Jason and him… What if it all Jason own feeling for falling in love with Kenny… What if Jason is just too possessive…?

He looked at Kenny in his sleep and his heart just melted… He tried to get up to get ready for work without waking Kenny but it is near impossible… Kenny awake with the slightest action…

Kenny: “Where you going?”
Darryl: “I need to get ready for work…”
Kenny: “What time already?”
Darryl: “7.40am…”
Kenny: “Oh ok… I’m up…”
Darryl: “You sleep a little longer ba… You don’t start work so early anyway…”
Kenny: “I need to leave with you…”
Darryl: “Why?”
Kenny: “You forget you took back the keys last night and return me the ring…”
Darryl: “I forgot…”
Kenny: “So does that means you have forgiven me?”
Darryl: “I don’t know… There are too many things involve now so I don’t know how to give you the answer…”
Kenny: “I’m not pressurizing you but I really don’t want to lose you…”
Darryl: “You should have think about that before…”
Kenny: “I do… I…”
Darryl: “I need to get ready for work… You keep the keys first… We may not be couple but we can still be friends…”
Kenny: “You serious on breaking up… “
Darryl: “I don’t know… Let me go to work first…”
Kenny: “Let have dinner tonight?”
Darryl: “I need sometime alone… Some other day ba…”
Kenny: “Then I shouldn’t be holding your keys then…”
Darryl: “Up to you…”

Darryl left for the shower and he heard Kenny left the house before him… He dried himself and head out… An empty feeling filled him up… He looked around and Kenny had really left… He head back into his room and saw Kenny left a note on the dressing table for him together with the ring…

“Darryl Dear,

I know it may be hard for you to forgive me on the mistake that I have done but I really want you to know that no matter what happen, I have never meant anything of such to happen…

I must admit that I am a coward for not admitting my mistake to you earlier because I myself am unsure of the happening… However, I have to take full responsibility of whatever have happen…

I hope you will forgive me one day and let me love you again like what I have love you for the past 20 years… I don’t want this to end but I know I am no longer in position to have any say in this relationship because of an error I made…

I am really sorry and hopefully I will hear from you soon…

Love,
Kenny Dear”

Darryl kept the note in his organizer and wore the ring around his neck. He got changed and went to work...

While he was driving to work, he just has an urge to call someone to talk to… So he dialed a number…

“Sawadee…”

Darryl: “Robin…”
Robin: “Darryl?” Robin sounded very weak..
Darryl: “Yes… How are you holding up?”
Robin: “I guess I’m OK… How are you?”
Darryl: “I’m ok… just need to talk to someone…”
Robin: ‘About Kenny?”
Darryl: “How do you know?”
Robin: “Well I guess he is the only topic you will not be able to talk to him about…”
Darryl: “You know me well…”
Robin: “So what happen…?”

Darryl told Robin what has happen and how confused he is feeling now… Robin said he understand how Darryl is feeling now but yet he also said that Darryl in fact have already forgiven Kenny due to the guilt that for the past few months, he has been avoiding him and not being a boyfriend to Kenny…

Darryl: “You really think so? But I have some many unanswered questions floating in my mind…”
Robin: “Yes I am sure… Why think so much? You know this is always your problem… You tend to think too much and then one leads to another, you feel that nothing seems to work anymore…”
Darryl: “But…”
Robin: “Ask yourself… Is it really very important to find out who is telling the truth? If it is Jason, then what will you do? Breakup with Kenny… If it is Kenny, forgive him?”
Darryl: “I know what you mean…”
Robin: “The most important thing you need to ask yourself is… Do you love Kenny? It may sound weird to you but the truth is you are not sure who is telling you the truth so why not give Kenny the benefit of doubt if you love him… Of course I am not asking you to forgive him if this ever happen again but at least for now… If you still love him, then there is nothing much you need to think about… You may be thinking why would Jason lied to you, right?”
Darryl: “Yup…”
Robin: “I cannot answer you on that question as well but all I know is that you know Kenny for more than 20 years already and I think he deserve another chance… But the decision is still up to you… However, from what I have heard from you just now, you have already forgiven him…”
Darryl: “Maybe I have… Thanks for the advice…”
Robin: “That what friends are for, right?”
Darryl: “So how you feeling now? Did you go for any treatment?”
Robin: “Erm…. Yes…”
Darryl: “I will fly there next month to visit you…”
Robin: “Really? Cool… I will make arrangement for you once you get the date fixed…”
Darryl: “OK… I will keep you updated… I really miss you…”
Robin: “Me too… So we catch up again… I’ll call you whenever I can…”
Darryl: “I will too… Got to go now… Heading into office…”
Robin: “OK, I will wait for your update…”
Darryl: “OK… Bye…”
Robin: “Hope to see both of you here next month…”
Darryl: “OK…”

After ending the call with Robin, Darryl made some calls to the travel agents to book the tickets to Bangkok… He really needs to see Robin and how he had been holding up… He booked tickets for 2…

To be continue…