Darryl didn’t sleep on that night… Kenny left him after tugging him to bed… He feel sad that Kenny asked for a break yet he feel relieved that he being left alone… His feeling is so confusing that Darryl breaks into tears again… He has forgotten how many times he had been crying since grandma passing on… He started to think of Kenny and what he has said…
A flashback down memory lane for the past 20 over years since he knows Kenny…
First day of ACS, Darryl was paired with a boy as buddy… But both of them just couldn’t click with each other… They fight and shouted at each other… Even their teacher could not take it and just 4 days into school terms, a transfer student from another class walk in and was made Darryl’s new buddy… His name is Kenny… (Yes, the teacher actually made a request to the principle to bring the arch nemesis apart by switching classroom)…
When Darryl first knows Kenny, he is this timid and quiet boy that will just sit in the classroom and not mingle with other people… Darryl on the other hand, is the devil of the class… But the relationship grew stronger over the years till ACJC… Even though in the process, they did not really talk about their sexual preference… Of course during the trial and error phase, they did try to date some girls before but nothing feels right for both of them…
Then come one day that Darryl decided to come out of the closet to Kenny… He remembered it was after his swimming training and Kenny was waiting for him. And there was the swimming instructor walking together with Darryl out the gate… Darryl introduces them and then bid goodbye to the instructor… It was then that Darryl come out of closet to Kenny that he and the instructor was seeing each other… He thought that Kenny will despise him but nope… Kenny come out on the same day too… And this got them even closer…
All these flashback from the coming out to the first break off to all the up and downs during their friendship lasted… Kenny has always been there for him and supported him in every single decision he made…
“Am I really too self centre? Is it too late for everything now?” Darryl thought but then he pick up his courage and decided to call Kenny…
*Ring Ring…. Ring Ring…*
Kenny: “Hello”
Darryl: “Dear...”
Kenny: “Yup… Everything ok?”
Darryl: “Yes… I just want to hear your voice…”
Kenny: “OK…”
Darryl: “I need to talk to you…”
Kenny: “Regarding… You want to go over now?”
Darryl: “No… We can talk over the phone… Don’t want you to rush…”
Kenny: “OK…Go ahead…”
Darryl: “Just now after you left me, I was totally lost without you around me… I had to have flashback on the things we done together over the years… From first knowing you, to our coming out together to now… I realize what you say have been totally correct… Most time, I only thinks for myself and forgets that you have been there for me since you appear in my life… When I need you most, you never failed to turn up next to me to lend me the shoulder or ears or anything you can give… But on the other hand, I was too busy with my work to be there for you… I’m sorry…”
Kenny: “Mmm Hmm…”
Darryl: “You know you make me realize that I have been a bad boyfriend to you… Never once I realize the love you have for me… I am sorry for not loving you for as much as you deserve…”
Kenny: “….”
Darryl: “I really think I can ever live my life without you in it… You been part of me since we first met this now… For the past 20plus years, you been my emotion, confidant my shoulder to cry on… And I don’t want this to end... I may not have say I love you everyday… I may not have showered with gift everyday… I may not have showed you the concern as much as you wanted me too… But I love you… Every time I say I wanted a break is because I don’t love you… Is more for me to organize myself around you… I’m sorry for hurting you with my actions… I am not asking you for your forgiveness and also not asking you… I’m sorry for not telling you earlier on how I really feel for you… You mean everything to me… And I really love you… I have say what I wanted to say to you… You rest early… Bye”
Kenny: “Wait….”
Darryl heard Kenny talking but he still hang up the phone… Within second, his phone ring… It’s Kenny…
Darryl: “Hello…”
Kenny: “I have yet to speak and you just hang up…”
Darryl: “Sorry…”
Kenny: “Thanks for letting me into your world… At least now I know it all worth it… I love you, dear…”
Darryl: “I love you too…”
Kenny: “I’m heading to the airport to send Robin off later then maybe I pop by to bring you some food…”
Darryl: “Thought he only leaving tomorrow…”
Kenny: “He said he have something on and need to go off soon…”
Darryl: “OK… Tell him I will visit him soon…”
Kenny: “OK… Promise me, don’t hurt yourself again…”
Darryl: “I promise…”
Kenny: “Love you always… I’ll see you later…”
Darryl: “OK…”
A flashback down memory lane for the past 20 over years since he knows Kenny…
First day of ACS, Darryl was paired with a boy as buddy… But both of them just couldn’t click with each other… They fight and shouted at each other… Even their teacher could not take it and just 4 days into school terms, a transfer student from another class walk in and was made Darryl’s new buddy… His name is Kenny… (Yes, the teacher actually made a request to the principle to bring the arch nemesis apart by switching classroom)…
When Darryl first knows Kenny, he is this timid and quiet boy that will just sit in the classroom and not mingle with other people… Darryl on the other hand, is the devil of the class… But the relationship grew stronger over the years till ACJC… Even though in the process, they did not really talk about their sexual preference… Of course during the trial and error phase, they did try to date some girls before but nothing feels right for both of them…
Then come one day that Darryl decided to come out of the closet to Kenny… He remembered it was after his swimming training and Kenny was waiting for him. And there was the swimming instructor walking together with Darryl out the gate… Darryl introduces them and then bid goodbye to the instructor… It was then that Darryl come out of closet to Kenny that he and the instructor was seeing each other… He thought that Kenny will despise him but nope… Kenny come out on the same day too… And this got them even closer…
All these flashback from the coming out to the first break off to all the up and downs during their friendship lasted… Kenny has always been there for him and supported him in every single decision he made…
“Am I really too self centre? Is it too late for everything now?” Darryl thought but then he pick up his courage and decided to call Kenny…
*Ring Ring…. Ring Ring…*
Kenny: “Hello”
Darryl: “Dear...”
Kenny: “Yup… Everything ok?”
Darryl: “Yes… I just want to hear your voice…”
Kenny: “OK…”
Darryl: “I need to talk to you…”
Kenny: “Regarding… You want to go over now?”
Darryl: “No… We can talk over the phone… Don’t want you to rush…”
Kenny: “OK…Go ahead…”
Darryl: “Just now after you left me, I was totally lost without you around me… I had to have flashback on the things we done together over the years… From first knowing you, to our coming out together to now… I realize what you say have been totally correct… Most time, I only thinks for myself and forgets that you have been there for me since you appear in my life… When I need you most, you never failed to turn up next to me to lend me the shoulder or ears or anything you can give… But on the other hand, I was too busy with my work to be there for you… I’m sorry…”
Kenny: “Mmm Hmm…”
Darryl: “You know you make me realize that I have been a bad boyfriend to you… Never once I realize the love you have for me… I am sorry for not loving you for as much as you deserve…”
Kenny: “….”
Darryl: “I really think I can ever live my life without you in it… You been part of me since we first met this now… For the past 20plus years, you been my emotion, confidant my shoulder to cry on… And I don’t want this to end... I may not have say I love you everyday… I may not have showered with gift everyday… I may not have showed you the concern as much as you wanted me too… But I love you… Every time I say I wanted a break is because I don’t love you… Is more for me to organize myself around you… I’m sorry for hurting you with my actions… I am not asking you for your forgiveness and also not asking you… I’m sorry for not telling you earlier on how I really feel for you… You mean everything to me… And I really love you… I have say what I wanted to say to you… You rest early… Bye”
Kenny: “Wait….”
Darryl heard Kenny talking but he still hang up the phone… Within second, his phone ring… It’s Kenny…
Darryl: “Hello…”
Kenny: “I have yet to speak and you just hang up…”
Darryl: “Sorry…”
Kenny: “Thanks for letting me into your world… At least now I know it all worth it… I love you, dear…”
Darryl: “I love you too…”
Kenny: “I’m heading to the airport to send Robin off later then maybe I pop by to bring you some food…”
Darryl: “Thought he only leaving tomorrow…”
Kenny: “He said he have something on and need to go off soon…”
Darryl: “OK… Tell him I will visit him soon…”
Kenny: “OK… Promise me, don’t hurt yourself again…”
Darryl: “I promise…”
Kenny: “Love you always… I’ll see you later…”
Darryl: “OK…”
After the conversation with Kenny, Darryl feel a bit relieved but yet not all the feeling is gone… He still very messed up in every single way you can imagine…. From grandma to Robin to Kenny to…. The list goes on and on… But the news of Robin going off for something on make Darryl assume that he is going back for treatment…
To be continue…
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